Most Disappointing Edition Yet 'Best. Diary. Ever' – Metro 'Cheeringly depressing' – Guardian'Abandon all hope, ye who buy it' – New York TimesPerpetual Disappointments Diary by Nick Asbury, the downbeat weekly journal for pessimists, stoics and losers everywhere, returns with its most disappointing edition yet. Ground yourself with Realistic Mindfulness Prompts, Demotivational Proverbs, Unhelpful Folk Rhymes, and reminders of Notable Deaths. Travel the world with Useful Phrases translated into four languages ('A table for one, please', 'I have destroyed my hire car’) plus advice for surviving Even Worse Case Scenarios (fighting a crocodile while tired, surviving an elephant stampede while running into an ex). Fill an idle moment with a Boring Crossword, and overcome creative blocks using Bleak Strategies.This may not be your year. But this is definitely your diary. This Edition includes:Realistic Mindfulness Prompts, Demotivational Proverbs, Unhelpful Folk Rhymes, Bleak Strategies, Even Worse Case Scenarios, Boring Crosswords, Notable Deaths, Bank Insecurity Questions, People Who Never Call, Notes Towards A Dull Novel, Pointless Doodles. This diary is not specific to one year – they are all basically the same.

Best. Diary. Ever, Cheeringly depressing, Abandon all hope, ye who buy it.

Nick Asbury is a writer and poet, and one half of UK creative partnership Asbury & Asbury. He is the creator of Perpetual Disappointments Diary and the co-author of A Smile in the Mind: Witty thinking in graphic design and has written for Creative Review, The Guardian and McSweeney’s Internet Tendency. He publishes daily poetry on Instagram as part of an ongoing project called Realtime Notes.