Mommy Man

As a teenager growing up in the 1980s, all Jerry Mahoney wanted was a nice, normal sham marriage: 2.5 kids and a frustrated, dissatisfied wife living in denial of her husband’s sexuality. Hey, why not? It seemed much more attainable and fulfilling than the alternative—coming out of the closet and making peace with the fact that he’d never have a family at all. Twenty years later, Jerry is living with his long-term boyfriend, Drew, and they’re ready to take the plunge into parenthood. But how? Adoption? Foster parenting? Kidnapping? What they want most of all is a great story to tell their future kid about where he or she came from. Their search leads them to gestational surrogacy, a road less traveled where they’ll be borrowing a stranger’s ladyparts for nine months. Thus begins Jerry and Drew’s hilarious and unexpected journey to daddyhood.  From then on, they’re in uncharted waters. They’re forced to face down homophobic baby store clerks, a hospital that doesn’t know what to do with them, even members of their own family who think what they’re doing is a little nutty. One thing’s for sure. If this all works out, they’re going to have an incredible birth story to tell their kid. With honesty, emotion, and laugh-out-loud humor, Jerry Mahoney ponders what it means to become a Mommy Man . . . and discovers that the answer is as varied and beautiful as the concept of family itself.

Comedy writer Mahoney, author of the Mommy Man blog, answers the question, “Just how do two gay men become dads?” in this uproarious look at the world of surrogacy. Mahoney’s prologue is written in the form of a letter to his future child explaining that the circumstances of the child’s birth sound like a veritable “adventure story.” He recalls his closeted teen years in the 1980s, when “being a gay teen, like totally sucked, dude.” Later, his coming out proves to be painless, and after a brief period of awkward online dating, he meets his boyfriend Drew, whose conversational skills and generosity help the couple through many difficulties on their path to parenthood. Once they choose surrogacy over adoption, Mahoney enters the period he refers to as “the spermification of my life,” when “suddenly everyone I knew felt comfortable discussing the flagellating residents of my man junk.” Over $100,000 must be collected; Drew’s sister agrees to donate her eggs and the couple finds a terrific surrogate. Months of medical miracles and close calls follow, interspersed with humorous asides about Prop 8 and registering for a baby shower. By the end of this touching book, the proud dads feel that they are the luckiest people alive., Comedy writer Mahoney struggled with his gay identity while growing up and, after settling into his career, stumbled through the process of coming out. He’d long ago conceded that it was unlikely he could ever merge his desire for a life as an openly gay man and having a family life. Then he had the good fortune, after a torturous introduction to gay dating in L.A., to find a loving partner equally interested in being a parent. The couple set about actually trying to have a family and learned of the numerous obstacles facing gay couples. They decided on gestational surrogacy with donated eggs to avoid genetic ties and legal controversy. Thus began a two-year process filled with ups and downs, from being interviewed to determine their suitability to interviewing to find the right egg donor and surrogate, with friends and family on hand to witness every setback and triumph. The roller coaster of drama and comedy ends in the birth of their twins. Mahoney is equally heartfelt and hilarious in this chronicle of modern parenthood., Mommy Man is the story of Jerry and his partner Drew and how they got together and decided they wanted to have kids. They chose surrogacy and I enjoyed the discussion of the fertility issues because I have several friends who have done IUIs and IVF as well as some LGBT friends who have adopted or used sperm donors. The story pretty much ends with the birth, so it’s not about parenting as much as it is about becoming parents. I really did laugh and cry while I was reading it. I read this on Mother’s Day and it was a perfect reminder of the miracle of life., Mommy Man: How I Went from Mid-Mannered Geek to Gay Superdad follows the author's life, from his teen years in the 1980s to his marriage to a wife willing to overlook the fact that he was gay. Twenty years later he was living with his long-term boyfriend—and wanting parenthood. How he and his boyfriend made choices that would lead him to become a father makes for an engrossing—and unexpectedly funny—saga that embraces the complexities of surrogacy and parenthood, mixes in a healthy dose of gay perspective, and ultimately succeeds in creating a warm, memorable and personal story recommended for any general interest reader interested in gay parenthood., It’s rare these days that I find the time to read a book, never mind get lost in it, but that's exactly what I did with the hilarious and poignant Mommy Man. Before I knew it, two hours had passed, and I'd completely fallen in love with Jerry and Drew. I can't remember the last time I enjoyed a book so much!

Jerry Mahoney is an award-winning comedy writer whose work has appeared in the New York Times and Westchester Magazine and on the Lifetime Moms website. He’s the author of the popular parenting blog Mommy Man: Adventures of a Gay Superdad, which was named one of the Top 10 Humor Blogs by Babble.com. He lives in New Rochelle, New York with his husband, Drew, and . . . well, the rest is quite a story.