Lessons from Loss

“There is no handbook for grief. There cannot be, because each loss is as unique as the person it belongs to.” (p.36) This is but one of the profound truths penned by Dominique Olivier in her book, Lessons from loss. The author does not strive to act as councilor or therapist, although she has a passion for reaching out to others who has suffered a loss. On the contrary, it is a painfully honest account of her journey through a devastating loss that she suffered.
Dominique lost both her husband and her young daughter in a horrific traffic accident. From the outset she makes it clear that there should be no hierarchy of loss. Although losing a spouse or a child is often deemed as the worst kind of loss, it can be the loss of a marriage, a miscarriage or a job that sets you off on a painful path of recovery. Another sentiment that struck home, is the idea that grief has no expiry date. (p.51) She describes it as “something chronic”.
The writer does not lean on sentimentality. The vivid descriptions of panic attacks, the constant anxiety that plagued her, the criticism that she encountered during the journey through her grief, painful triggers – all of this put together in a remarkable account of loss, and an attempt to “move forward” not to “move on”.
Whether or not you are a member of what the author calls “The Losers Club”, membership of which can only be obtained by own loss, the journey of Dominique Olivier will not leave you untouched.